This past week has been rough

One week ago today, I left my son home from school because he had a stomach ache. I didn't think it would hurt him to be home alone since he is 11 and considering he would probably sleep most of the morning anyway and school was only a half of a day and I knew my mother-in-law would be there around 11pm to watch the younger two when they got off of the school bus. It was about 11am when I received a tragic call at work. It was my MIL calling to tell me that my neighbor had passed away. Now my neighbor isn't your ordinary neighbor. She and my brother were best friends growing up, so I've known her for a very long time. She was more like a sister to me. She was only 27 years old and had an 11 year old daughter.

About 8 years ago, she was in a bad car wreck. A school bus hit her. Ever since that wreck, she wasn't the same person. She had lost all short term memory and had very bad back pain. She had to take pain medication to control the pain in her back.

We moved beside her a year before this car accident. She and I became close friends through the years and our children have grown up together. She was an amazing person, but had her quirks as well. She loved my children as if they were her own. I've never met anyone, in my life, that had so much love to spread and share. Anytime she went somewhere, she always brought back something for my children, even if it was just to McDonalds or the gas station. It didn't have to be somewhere extravagant. She always showered them with gifts. If she bought something for her daughter, she bought it for my children as well. I will never meet or have another friend that will love my kids like she did. Because of this, my heart will forever be cracked.

That morning, when I left my son home alone, her grandparents found her in her bedroom, in a chair, dead. :( The paramedics said that she probably passed away the night before or early that morning. As soon as I recieved the phone call from my MIL, I immediately left work and went home. I didn't even take the time to tell anyone I was leaving. I had to get home before my children got off the bus. I couldn't shield my oldest from the horrific scene of ambulances, firetrucks and flashing lights going on outside of my house. But, I was going to shield my youngest two. Those two were the closest to her. By the time I got home, all emergency vehicles were gone, which left crying neighbors outside. I brought the two youngest inside and explained to them what happened.

They took the news a lot easier than I thought they would. They even took it a lot better than I did. I'm not sure if they completely understand yet. They are still asking questions about death and it saddens me to answer them, but I do. We are still unsure of her cause of death, but we think she may have taken the pain medication and then forgot she took it and then took another one. The autopsy should come back soon.

This past weekend, we laid my dear friend to rest and said our good byes. And we will move on with a smile on our face, like she would want us to, but we will never forget the impact she has made in our lives. I hope that my children will keep the good memories they shared with her and learn from all of her generosity and kindness.

RIP, Amanda. I love you.